“Where is my place in God’s plan?”
This question can keep us awake, tossing and turning at 2:47am, wondering if we’re really doing what God wants us to do.
Over the last year God has been teaching me some really deep concepts about His Kingdom work and how God can work through us to glorify His overall plan to complete His Kingdom on earth and in Heaven. Though this is one of those topics that God must show us how we uniquely fit into His plan, I want to share with you my personal experience through the lens of my transition of homeschooling my son for the past nine years to facing his fast approaching graduation.
This last year I've carried a melting pot of emotions around with me as each milestone approached, seeing him cross over from young man to adulthood– my heart filled with joy although slightly conflicted by the tiniest bit of grief. As a mother this is what I’d trained him for…. yet the slow tearing away is painful – like pulling a Band-Aid away slowly. At the same time there’s such a deep sense of gratitude and pride as I’ve reflected on how far he’s come.
A perfect example of this is the the day that he took his High School graduation photos on the water next to our home. This piece of waterfront property belonging to our family is such a special place for us and the photographer was capturing the soul of his personality- I was feeling such gratitude for this milestone moment juxtaposed by grief that his time of being little was now over. All the memories flooded my mind– from his first birthday party, to the day he was baptized on his eleventh birthday, and all the times in between when he had fished here.
For me the struggle in these transitions are so deeply rooted in how I’ve viewed my purpose. As his mother I’d been preparing him so that he could launch into the world as a full grown adult.
I knew this day would come, yet it doesn't make it any easier to go through. This sliver of my life’s purpose was coming to a close.
I've been looking through photos, reminiscing over his life over these last weeks, often recognizing the evidence of God's hand in every part of it. I simply could not have parented with the same result without God.
Perhaps the most significant decision I’ve made on behalf of my children—with the Lord's leading—was to homeschool my kids. This is just one way that I was “walking out” the Kingdom Work that God put in front of me.
I recently shared my experience of this calling to be a homeschooling mom in the newest issue of The Sisterhood Magazine.
"But truthfully, I never felt equipped to homeschool, although I always admired mom's that did. But 9 years ago after starting both my children in private school I felt the Holy Spirit nudging me to pray and consider this huge endeavor to homeschool my children.
My heart sank one afternoon as I looked at my frustrated 8-year-old son from across the kitchen peninsula. I was trying to keep him focused on his homework as I prepared dinner.
It pained me to make him push through this extra work given to him when he was so clearly depleted from his day at school. On this particular day he was DONE — he had nothing left to give.”
I wish I could say that pulling him out of a classroom to homeschool made things easier. But it didn’t—at least not at first. For the first few years there were daily battles and lots of tears. (From both of us!) But as I put my trust in the Lord’s guidance and learned what my son truly needed, there were less battles and complaints…then a drastic shift…. then I began to see him flourish.
“He had lots of struggles, but by high school he was taking online courses and managing his own schedule … though they still talked through the challenging parts together.
Nine years later, just a few weeks ago, I sat across from my now 17-year-old son in the local coffee shop talking to him about his goals and how he’ll be finishing his senior year.
Now, I was able to tell him how proud I am of him and how I see the responsible young man he has become.”
Friends, influencing the children in our lives –in a wide variety of ways– IS Kingdom work! God appoints some of us to train them up and launch them into the world in order for the process to repeat so that they may also work according to His will and for His glory!
What a privilege we have!
And this is just one example of how God calls us to His Kingdom work.
My article in the newest Issue of Sisterhood Magazine includes more pieces of my story — some of which may surprise you! — that illustrate how God works through us to glorify His overall plan to complete HIS Kingdom work on earth and in Heaven.